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Tongue-in-Cheek MMORPG CDG?

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Fri, 11/06/2015 - 01:53
HandsomeGames
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I am the creator of ReadyCheck (website below). ReadyCheck is a light hearted take on the drama of guild building in an MMORPG. We went heavy on the theme (and light on mechanics) and I would love to get some feedback on it.

Link to site: http://handsomegames.wix.com/readycheck

Specifically what I am hoping to get out of my request is your honest feedback. Is it funny? Is it catchy? Is the art consistent? Are the cards laid out clearly? Does the Wipe mechanic make sense (initial playtests suggest the Wipe conditions are *very* hard to play around. We had to pare back a lot and simplify). Are cards readable? Is flavor text funny? etc.

Answers to those questions... or no answers at all... are what I seek.

Thank you all so very much in advance.

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Fri, 11/06/2015 - 07:32
#1
schattentanz
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- Instructions PDF - Coming

- Instructions PDF -
Coming Soon

I don't know, what to reply to your query, since apparently there is no way to read your rules, I'm afraid.

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Fri, 11/06/2015 - 08:19
#2
HandsomeGames
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Ahh fair point! I will fix

Ahh fair point! I fixed the link to the instructions. It should be working now.

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Fri, 11/06/2015 - 15:42
#3
let-off studios
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Definitions

Some randomly-organized comments...

I'm not an honest-to-goodness online gamer, so I have no idea what some of your acronyms and terms are. For example, someone who casually picks up this game may not realize that DPK is equivalent to victory points. I suggest you consider including a glossary to clarify what you mean by terms like PUG, DPK, DPS, even the term Ready Check, even though knowing the definitions isn't necessarily required to play the game correctly.

Regarding other terms: can you actually use the term "nerf"? I understand that you're using it in context as a verb in most cases, but Nerf may still have issue with you using that word even if not as a noun or adjective.

Regarding the theme: I can imagine there will be PLENTY of folks who understand the humor and references in this game. I imagine it will be a matter of marketing properly to online gaming groups instead of focusing your attention on tabletop gamers (for whom the theme will be hit-or-miss).

I like the sound of your Patch Notes mechanic. It sounds like it will keep games ever-changing and less-predictable from one match to the next.

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Fri, 11/06/2015 - 19:51
#4
HandsomeGames
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Re: your point about a

Re: your point about a glossary, was the write up in the Rules section not clear enough about what exactly PUG, DKP, and DPS are? We for sure didn't define DPS and can do that (as an online gamer, allow me to rhetorically ask "do people really not know what DPS is?"). I thought we had explained PUG and DKP but will make sure we improve that.

Re: not understanding references. This isn't the first time I have heard feedback along those lines. As much as I love the *heavy* theme of this game, perhaps we can scale back on *some* of the online gamer references.

Your point about nerf is an interesting one. It's not a real word. I think we will survive though given the public acceptance and usage of the word nerf (as something completely unrelated to Nerf).

Most importantly, thank you so much for taking the time to review this.

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Sat, 11/07/2015 - 01:44
#5
let-off studios
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Nope.

While the acronyms were cited as having specific functions in the game, I saw no explanation of what PUG means (maybe "pick-up gamer"), what DKP means (I won't even fathom a guess), I understand that DPS means "damage per second," but that term wasn't mentioned anywhere in the rules I read and I don't really see its connection to granting additional character powers. I apologize if it seems like I'm splitting hairs on this. Maybe I'm just "reading it too hard." I think the game would be enjoyable/understandable even while not knowing the meaning of those terms, but my main point is that it can distance potential players and seem alienating.

[EDIT: I just saw "pick-up group" referenced for PUG on the website but not in the rulebook. Sorry I missed that!]

And my reason for bringing up "nerf" is that it's an honest-to-goodness recognized brand name that selling well year after year, and I disagree with your notion that "it's not a real word." I think that the average person is more familiar with a Nerf gun than the concept of nerfing overpowered spells and whatnot. It sounds like an invitation to a legal issue, but maybe that's just me.

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Sat, 11/07/2015 - 21:37
#6
kos
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Feedback

HandsomeGames wrote:
Is it funny? Is it catchy? Is the art consistent? Is flavor text funny?

It's hard to answer these questions without seeing the rest of the cards. The examples shown in the rules look good. Though in the anatomy of a card section I'd remove the labels for "Hilarious flavor text" and "Zany card art". The more somebody has to tell me that something is funny the less funny it appears.

As per previous comments, expanding the acronyms on first use would be helpful. As it is the rules are aimed at online gamers (which is obviously the target market), but I think that overuse of "in" terms in the core rules will restrict your market. In-jokes in the flavor text are good, but you don't want to put off potential customers by making them think that they don't belong here.

HandsomeGames wrote:
Are the cards laid out clearly? Are cards readable?

I would make the font size bigger. For example, on the dungeon card the Dungeon Type and the Wipe text are very small, but these are important parts of the card that need to be referenced. If possible I would make the body text bigger too.

The visual indication of the PUG effect (the blue arrow) is not intuitive. Consider if there is a better way to visually show that this text applies only when played as a PUG.

HandsomeGames wrote:
Does the Wipe mechanic make sense?

It made sense to me.

HandsomeGames wrote:
Answers to those questions... or no answers at all... are what I seek.

Yes, I know that DPS is. But I also know many gamers (not online gamers) who don't. If your intention is to sell product, you don't want to exclude any portion of what is already a fairly small market.

Re "nerf": Consider if "debuff" fits just as well and avoids any contention.

"Playing the Game", first sentence: Consider "their" instead of "his".

The Suburban Proletariat has "King" in the title. Is it necessary to limit this card to males?

I noticed "Gamer Girl" amongst the Guildmember cards shown. I hope this is not the only female card in the deck. One of the ways to break down gender stereotypes is to show that both males and females come in a variety of personalities -- females can be noob, casual, hardcore, etc, just like males. Similarly with racial stereotypes. From the card art shown in the examples I couldn't pick out any characters who were anything other than caucasian.

http://www.dorktower.com/2010/08/30/dork-tower-monday-august-30-2010/

* gets down off soapbox

First page, right hand side says "don’t worry you can always gKick them during the Guild Maintenance Phase". The wording of this sentence made me assume that the Maintenance Phase comes after the Dungeon Phase, which then threw me when I found out it was the other way around. Consider rewording as something like "don’t worry you can always gKick them during your next Guild Maintenance Phase".

Second page, right hand side you've used the convention of the Phases being bold followed by a colon. Then you break the convention by using the same font style for Raid and Grind. Consider if you can change the layout/formatting to make it more obvious that Raid and Grind a subsets of Dungeon Phase.

On the same point, given that Grind is so much simpler than Raid, I would put Grind above Raid on the page. That way the reader can mentally get Grind out of the way and then focus on Raiding.

The rules around PUGs are not obvious, being buried as they are in the definition of a class. It's also not clear whether a player can play a PUG on another player during their turn, or whether a player could play a PUG on themselves after a raid has started.

The rules make a clear differentiation between Players (the real people playing the game) and Guildmembers (the cards), but the website uses the two terms interchangeably.

Overall, I think this game has real promise. The packaging/art is attractive and the complexity/play time looks like it would be a good fit for the target market.

Hope that helps,
kos

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Sun, 11/08/2015 - 00:17
#7
HandsomeGames
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Thank you all *so* much for

Thank you all *so* much for the feedback. I've taken it all very seriously. I am currently reworking the Rules, thinking about name changes (e.g. Nerf to Debuff and elimination of male suggestive terms) and also changing which cards we display on our site / future KS.

kos wrote:
in the anatomy of a card section I'd remove the labels for "Hilarious flavor text" and "Zany card art".

We were hoping the inclusion of the terms "zany" and "hilarious" played into the tongue-in-cheekiness of it all. Seems as though it is not being received as intended. We will look into removing them.

kos wrote:
you don't want to put off potential customers by making them think that they don't belong here.

This plus what others have said above (plus feedback from other sources) are pushing us towards rethinking some of our terminology / acronyms. For instance, we are just about ready to remove the use of "DKP" all together. It doesn't add anything (but for theme) and it seems to be an unknown term to most table toppers (and video gamers for that matter, DKP being a very old term back from my text-based MMORPG days).

kos wrote:
I would make the font size bigger. For example, on the dungeon card the Dungeon Type and the Wipe text are very small, but these are important parts of the card that need to be referenced. If possible I would make the body text bigger too.

Is this a critique of the just the Dungeon cards, or would you prefer larger font other cards as well? I ask because Dungeon cards are, generally, not held in hand and thus you have to read them from farther away. Most cards body-text is 10 pt font. We will look into upping the font size from 10 to 12 for the body-text and increasing the Wipe condition font size (currently sitting at 7pt)

kos wrote:
The visual indication of the PUG effect (the blue arrow) is not intuitive. Consider if there is a better way to visually show that this text applies only when played as a PUG.

I struggled a lot with this one. If only card games had a universal sign for "Discard this card to...". I suppose one option is to simply write that on the card. I'm very hesitant to make changes that limit the strong theme in the game. We love the idea of a random class showing up to assist with a large raid. It allows us to play, thematically, with the raid and guild makeup. This (and the need to ensure a hand of "all classes" wasn't a surefire way to lose immediately) was the impetus for having a "PUG" ability in the first place. But again, this is not the first time we have heard this feedback. We are looking into a cleaner way to showcase the PUG abilities on the cards.

kos wrote:
Re: http://www.dorktower.com/2010/08/30/dork-tower-monday-august-30-2010/

This is something we are very sensitive about. In our limited ~40 cards that we have created so far (i.e. made artwork for), we have been careful to ensure adequate representation across all genders and nationalities (and avoiding the issue altogether if possible). While "Gamer Girl" exists and she seems to be a Noob, we also have cards such as:

Officer Material - a female military officer covered head to toe in medallions
Link: http://tinyurl.com/powerzd

and

Kickstarter Backer - a female astronaut doctor lawyer space cowboy
Link: http://tinyurl.com/olcletx

And the reference to "King" we thought was okay because it was in fact a female in the picture. As if to challenge the notions that Kings have to be male.

On a personal note, having four sisters has made me pull out a similar gender-equality (or at least representation here) soap box on occasion.

That said, I did a poor job of representing the equality in my KS and website. We were sure to make sure skin tones range (even into unnatural looking oranges and grays) and of course that we were cautious with our use of "him" and "her."

kos wrote:
Re: Instruction book updates...

I will be completely overhauling the instruction book. It simply wasn't clear or organized enough. I've taken all of your points into consideration. Hopefully round 2 of the instructions will be much cleaner.

Can't thank you all enough for your feedback thus far. Stay tuned for phase 2. Thanks!!

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Sun, 11/08/2015 - 01:29
#8
kos
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Re: Feedback

HandsomeGames wrote:
Is this a critique of the just the Dungeon cards, or would you prefer larger font other cards as well? I ask because Dungeon cards are, generally, not held in hand and thus you have to read them from farther away.

I'd make all of them bigger font (especially the categories and wipe conditions), but cards on the table are more important to be bigger font for the reason you said. While the Guildmember cards are played from the hand, they are originally selected from the table.

HandsomeGames wrote:
This (and the need to ensure a hand of "all classes" wasn't a surefire way to lose immediately) was the impetus for having a "PUG" ability in the first place.

Dual use cards are a good idea (for the reasons you stated), so I wouldn't mess with the mechanic. It's just the visual representation that needs some work. Even just text might do it:
"PUG: Steal a stash card from another player then discard."

All the best with your game,
kos

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Tue, 11/10/2015 - 02:19
#9
HandsomeGames
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We spent a lot of work these

We spent a lot of work these past few days revamping the instruction booklet as well as simplifying the cards and making them more readable (font sizes, less wordy cards, etc.).

http://handsomegames.wix.com/readycheck

Thank you all so much for your support. Please feel free to look again. We are pretty comfortable with the game at this point. We always welcome feedback.

- Paul

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