Axis Mundi Introduction and Playthrough Video - Feedback Wanted

Hi,

It's going to be very hard to answer your questions about the rules because no-one has that much time to go through the video and understand everything, because it appears the rules have merged into the play through...

You've set yourself too many objectives and tried to cram the answer them all them in a single video. My suggestion? You need several videos.

A 30 second sales video
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What's the game? Why do I care? Why is it fun? I can watch this and get a high level overview for it, and begin to imagine how it will play.

2min rules overview
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3 players, spinny island, demonic powers, etc. How do I win? How do I lose? How can I humiliate and crush my friends? What's the same, what's different? If it's completely different am I going to spend 4 hours learning it?

25 min detailed rules overview
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This should cover the actual rules. I wouldn't bother filming the board for this. This is more a diagramed approach, with animations.

3 hour Playthrough
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Get real people and get them playing! Show us (and your potential purchasers) that you are having fun! And then overlay what's happening on the video so we can see the 'hidden' information.

That's my 2 pence (UK :D)

Nick

Google "How to make a sell sheet" Stephen Key with inventRight. I believe this is a very powerful tool board game designers need to master. It will help with everything to do with marketing, finding publishers, and distributors. The key of the sell sheet is the one line benefit statement. Imagine putting that entire 3.5 hour video into ONE SENTENCE. That is where your mind should be focused. Once you hook possible customers, distributors, or a publisher then they ask you for more information on your Game. The big difference is getting them to say, "Wow that sounds interesting, I need to know more about that".
That's my Hay-penny of value for you!! Good work getting to where you are. I have developed so much respect for game designers, and any innovative person that actually gets a product to the light of day.....profitable or not!!

You're entitled to your opinion (respectfully). But from watching his VIDEO his game looks "more like a mystery"... Why are there several levels and why do they rotate?! After watching "X" minutes of the video... Can you answer those two (2) questions??

If the answer is NO... Well then he's already got his HOOK. The game in itself seems like a bit of an "enigma". The board seems to be more "abstract" and lends well to "mystery", "puzzle-ish" gameplay and "unpredictable" twists and turns (See that... PUN intended!)

That's why I wouldn't spill all the beans in a sales or intro video.

Each game respectfully deserves it's own video. Not all games are the same. IMHO I've already explained how I see his game. To me it should be something "enigmatic". And that's just my opinion based on what @Peter has shown in his video...

Cheers!

Sorry I don't have anything to ROAST ... But that's about the time I got bored and lost interest. Nothing worst than watching "Some Dude" present his game with which he will conquer the world with... (LOL)

But I'm feeling "extra nice" today ... and have a suggestion:

Could you make the "white" area between the layers BLACK??? That would go a long way in making the layers seem more "seamless". The bright white is a pure contrast and it "breaks up" the different layers. IMHO I think making it BLACK would make the board look more "polished"!

TBH I think it would make the game look "more professional". If you can't do it for the prototype, that's fine ... But when you get the game made professionally (manufactured), I would ensure then that the layers look as "seamless" as possible.

I don't know how to play (and it does interest me ... because the board is NOT so typical). But you've only got 2:30 to WOW me into thinking THIS is the game that I NEED to play!

And BTW you are on the "good path" when you ask the question: "Why should players play Axis Mundi instead of another game?" Make that your 60 second EXPLANATION of "why"... And you'll for sure have a video which offers something for the viewer to "ponder".

Cheers @Peter!

Yeah, it's not really about going into the book. I wouldn't do that. It's more about introducing basic info about the game early on. There are more than a few seconds between your tantalising mention of the book and finally telling your audience what the game is about and what kind of game it is.

I wouldn't spend long on the backstory either. Information about the actual game itself is more important.

Why are players taking WOUNDS just by walking around the board? It doesn't make sense that you would lose some kind of health just by walking around. Accessible Hexes and Cave Hexes cause wounds when you walk into them (1 Wound)... Okay maybe the Cave Hexes makes a bit sense, you're walking into a dark area and can get wounded walking around in the dark... But Accessible Hexes... What is the LOGIC in that???

Another note, instead of "Inaccessible Hexes" make them "Lava Flow Hexes" which in turn cause Wounds when you walk into them. Like 2 Wounds when you walk onto an "Lava Flow Hex" and an additional 1 Wound if you remain in that hex during the end of your turn. So up to 3 Wounds if you enter and STAY in a "Lava Flow Hex". So the Darkness of Caves does 1 Wound and Lava would do 2 Wounds (and possibly 3 if you remain on that hex).

Also I would ADD more "Lava Flow Hexes" maybe like 4 or 5 of them... And maybe the Demon doesn't suffer from any Wounds from "Lava Flow Hexes" while the Angel suffers 2 Wounds from any "Lava Flow Hex"...

Just some ideas ... while watching the Video.

But I think from what I understood so far, the players emerge OUT of the Volcano an "Angel" or a "Demon"... And the goal is to RETURN to your starting hex and board your ship to escape from the Island. The decision to become an "Angel" or a "Demon" is decided by a fateful 1d6 roll.

I'm at 1:45 and the Beastmaster has become a "Demon"... Will continue to watch more to see how the game unfolds from there onwards!

The game reminds me a "bit" like "Betrayal at house on the hill" without the "scenario/betrayal" mechanic. In this game, it's the reverse... Players join forces TOGETHER to defeat the Angel or Demon.

Having gone through about HALF of the video, the "mystery" is a bit lost... And I feel like it's a "gimmicky hex movement game". Yeah the turning of the levels "adds" a bit of "dynamic play". BUT I feel like "fundamentally" you are still playing on Hexes.

My INITIAL impressions about the board were like: "Wow, this is so different and I wonder how the game is played???" Watching the video and seeing that it is merely a "sophisticated" Hex-based movement, I am a bit disappointed.

Also I'm not very interested by the "characters" either. To me it seems like even if they are a BIT different... I'm not impressed by them either. (Sorry I'm being honest about what I've watched so far...)

Okay enough about the "Negatives" ... Let me explain my "Initial Wonder".

So when I saw the board... I wasn't sure about how the players would move on it. It was Anti-Climactic to simply move like normal Hex-based games. I guess you're probably too far along in the design to "ponder" a different style of play. Fundamentally the game is DONE. However when I first saw the "Board", it made me think how are players to move around. I was picturing something ALA "Sorry!" or something like you need to complete a level BEFORE moving onto the next one. Instead is all you need is sufficient MOVE POINTS (3 points) to reach the next level. I was thinking there would be more to this than just "vanilla hex movement".

What could you have done? I'll just give a brief idea (which you can ignore because it would impact your design too much).

Each "RING" of tiles, is a LEVEL of game... You are in some kind of deep caves that travel to a point known as "the secret to the island" in the middle, most deepest point in the cavernous "underground". Each time you PLAY, the "Secret" would be different and would affect how the 2nd phase of the game would occur. Sometimes it would mean that you would need to RECRUIT one of the other players to HELP you, other times you go it alone, etc. This could allow a LOT of replayability and could be more "scenario-based".

At each level, before being able to "move on" to the next level, you MUST "unlock" and solve the PUZZLE for each level. I would ADD a FOURTH (4th) player who is sort of the "Puzzle Master". And seeing as your board is ABSTRACT (or that's how I perceived it before learning more about the game...), different kinds of Puzzle could require solving before progressing to the next level (deeper) in the caves.

Something like that. Because I felt the "board" looked more "abstract".

Anyways that's what I got as an early impression...

Note: Instead of crates giving you bonuses, they could offer CLUEs to help unlock and solve the level's Puzzle. The Puzzle Master could "seed" each level with clues to solving each one.

What I would think would be "better" is to "flesh-out" the characters more. Like the "Cultivator" could "Dr. Petra Venkova" a russian holistic doctor. Or the "Beastmaster" could be "Johnny A. Battlemore" a american hoodlum from the wrong side of town... And lastly the "Malignant" could be "Howard E. Strain" an escaped patient from a secret science lab... Or something along those lines...

Maybe turning them into ACTUAL "characters" as opposed to "boiler-plate" roles might make the game more interesting... Something "minor" to think about that could help DRIVE the "Story" aspect of the game...

Cheers!

Note #1: I only suggest this because the game seems to be more "abstract" than "narrative". And since your game is "loosely" and somehow based on the novel "S", I would expect to have some fictitious "characters" which whom you can build a larger story around.

As it stands now: the "beastmaster", the "cultivator" and the "malignant" seem very GENERIC and "abstract" ideas rather than people the player's can relate to more easily.

Note #2: I also suggest to try to make the game LESS and LESS "abstract" looking. Why? Because I feel many people will be like: "Wow this looks cool..." And then when you learn about the game, you figure out that the rotation is only a gimmick to hex-based movement.

One of my comments is that you seem to be playing too "neutrally" with the Demon. I would have done +3 Move/turn and jump down as QUICKLY as possible and then ready myself for an all-out war at the Demon's Warehouse. Or something like that.

It took too long to play IMHO. And there were always THINGS that you forgot to do (like wounds or place infection markers or area of effect, etc.) which mean that the game is TOO COMPLEX. Or at least could use some simplification.

Instead of spreading "infection markers", you could simply do "+1 damage" to your opponent based on the "infection" he/she has (when you are next to any opponent). So just being adjacent to another player inflicts a wound.

This is just an example on how to simplify things but keep with the whole "infectious character"...

There are always alternatives that allow you to do something similar in a less complicated way. Something you should consider.

Having watched the entire video... I am a bit disappointed on how you chose to END IT. You just STOP even before a victory. Second point, is if your Demon did NOT make it to his ship, that would have been too many turns to figure out he wins/loses. TBH you would think that getting back to the ship needs to take at most 5 turns (less than HALF of the game). You said we were on ROUND #12 when you ended the game.

That means 36 turns... IMHO I think the game is INVERTED. It's too easy to BECOME the "Demon" or "Angel" and then all the effort is put into defeating them. That's what I mean by INVERTED. It should take MORE time to become the "Demon" or "Angel" and then it should take a fraction of the game time to finish the last 25% (or so) of the game.

I'm just explaining to you my thoughts.

In essence what I am saying is that you should spend 75% of the time trying to BECOME the "Demon" or "Angel". And then the last 25% should be a race to the finish with some melee battles. IDK.

What I am trying to present as my point/opinion is that IF after 40 turns you KILL the "Demon" and then everything get RESET... That's a real bitch to have to play 40 more turns... The game's play time is somewhat questionable. It's too long, too many small things to do and watch for, etc. I'm sure you could manage to "streamline" it a bit... To make it quicker in terms of play time.

Best of luck(!?) with your game!

Maybe also remove the whole "1st Phase/2nd Phase" powers and just stick to one complement of abilities. The point I was trying to make with the previous comment was ONCE someone reaches the "Axis Mundi" and "evolves", it's either THAT player who wins the game or the other two (2) players who win the game ... by preventing the "evolved" character from accomplishing his/her victory condition.

It has got to end by 40 turns (IMHO).

You can't have someone ELSE run back to the top and START ALL OVER again.