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[Proof Reading/Feedback] The Maiden Voyage (8 pages)

3 replies [Last post]
Sat, 12/17/2016 - 09:58
Dravvin
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Joined: 03/29/2016

Hi,

I'd really appreciate some feedback on my streamline rules for The Maiden Voyage.

I've both a low ink (https://goo.gl/i8FdAQ) and full colour (https://goo.gl/JGQ3sc) version.

here's also a Rules Reference (https://goo.gl/nKtFjv) document although my priority is the standard rules if you have limited time.

My aim is that you are able to get started and play the game by reading just the standard Rules (the final page is a player aid) and only refer to the Rules Reference if you get stuck. The layout is not finalised - it's laid out like this for ease of printing!

All and any feedback would be appreciated.

Thanks in advance :)

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Sat, 12/17/2016 - 15:18
#1
witnessoftruth
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Joined: 12/15/2016
Feedback for standard rules

Dravvin,

I admit straight away that I am new here and not coming from a designers background. Actually I am a freelance writer and editor, and when I saw the post for proofreads I decided to give it a go.

Your game concept is excellent. I was very impressed with the complex nature of the gameplay yet the accessibility of the rules. I was not confused or overwhelmed at all by the concepts you introduced.

From the writing angle everything was cohesive enough to understand as well, I am engaged in another project but I would like to read over the larger file later this weekend.

Overall I would say you have done very well, thank you for the opportunity to proofread your material.

Regards,
witnessoftruth

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Sat, 12/17/2016 - 15:33
#2
Dravvin
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Thank-you so much for your

Thank-you so much for your feedback :)

I originally had 52 pages of rules and reduced most of them down to 8 plus the rules reference (which is still a little long but not meant to be read cover to cover in a single sitting!). I hate sitting reading rulebooks so that was a challenge to myself - reduce it down to a sensible amount I would be happy to read before playing.

The fact that you play board games and are a technical author means your feedback is as good if not better than many other people! This is my first major project too - so I'm by no means experienced either :)

Thank-you again and perhaps I can return the favour at some point :)

Janice

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Sat, 12/17/2016 - 17:20
#3
witnessoftruth
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Joined: 12/15/2016
A pleasure

It is always a pleasure. I look forward to watching the progress of The Maiden Voyage and would be honored to proofread or edit anything that would be of benefit to you. Have a great day.

-Dave

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